“What soap to use to wash my lady bits?”
r/Perimenopause · thread title · Direct quote

Outside and inside are different

Routine cleaning is for the outside. Avoid douching or putting cleanser inside the vagina. Water is sufficient for many people; if you prefer cleanser, choose a plain fragrance-free option that you tolerate and use it externally.

Keep the routine comfortable

  • Use water and gentle handling. Avoid vigorous rubbing or scrubbing.
  • If using a cleanser, rinse it away thoroughly and stop if it stings, dries, or irritates.
  • Dry gently. Change out of damp clothing when practical.
  • Avoid fragranced intimate sprays, deodorants, and internal cleansing products.

There is no universal product that every person needs. If you have a vulvar skin condition or ongoing discomfort, ask for a routine suited to that condition.

Water-only care

Feeling clean and having no detectable scent are not the same goal. A stronger cleanser is not a diagnostic tool. If odor persists or has changed, a clinician can help identify what is happening.

If you still want a cleanser

Look at the exact formula, intended body area, fragrance ingredients, and how your skin responds. “Intimate,” “natural,” or “menopause” on a bottle does not establish treatment benefit.

Compare an external vulva cleanserUnderstand product claims

Sources behind this guide

  1. ACOG: Vulvovaginal Health
  2. NHS: Vaginitis
  3. AUA/SUFU/AUGS; endorsed by The Menopause Society and ISSWSH: Genitourinary Syndrome of Menopause Guideline

Sources checked November 12, 2026. This is general information, not a diagnosis or personal treatment advice.